Keeping Your Marriage Strong When Baby Comes Along

Over 19 years ago, our first child was born. I remember the anticipation and awe I felt toward the process and my child’s prenatal development. But, if I am to be completely honest, it was also a very difficult time for my own sanity and our marriage.

Just before we found out my wife’s pregnancy, I was attending school full-time, and working 70 hours per week at a combination of three jobs. Sleep was minimal, but I was happy and feeling I was doing well in providing for my wife and myself. As my sleep starting to occur more often in the classroom than at home, I felt a change was needed. I went to my full-time employer, who offered benefits, and asked about my standing there; they said it was perfectly safe. So I went to one of my part-time jobs, and gave my 2-week notice. They DAY AFTER, the full-time employer laid off all of its employees, leaving me with only 10 hours of employment and no insurance. Just before this whole ordeal began, we found at Sarah (my wife) was pregnant.

I knew about morning sickness, but I was not prepared for how often Sarah would be sick. We’re talking 24/7, for almost the entire 9 months. I didn’t realize how emotionally dependent I was on her, and yet I felt I had to be the strong one, and hid my emotions and concerns.

Of course, everything worked out in the end, and 19 years later we are the proud parents of 3 wonderful children. We even look back on the time laughing, especially at the time when the Lamaze instructor nearly kicked us out of her class because we couldn’t stop laughing while breathing “hee hee hoo.”

But I also realize it didn’t HAVE to be the way it was, or as difficult to myself or our marriage. With a combination of years of research, experience, observation, and by learning from others, I’ve written the book “Grow Your Marriage by Leaps & Boundaries” in a way that will help couples—whether they are first-time parents, newlyweds, or have been married for dozens of years. I believe it’ll help you minimize conflict, strengthen commitment, and find ways of being the couple you’ve always wanted to be.


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